Lee’s Insights

This is a must see… just saw it and had to share!

Carnegie Mellon Professor Randy Pausch, who is dying from pancreatic cancer, gave his last lecture at the university Sept. 18, 2007, before a packed McConomy Auditorium. In his moving talk, “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams,” Pausch talked about his lessons learned and gave advice to students on how to achieve their own career and personal goals.

Watch it here:

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=362421849901825950&pr=goog-sl

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I love this concept… if you want more out of life, you’ve got to make room for it. If the space for whatever it is you want is occupied by something else that isn’t working, there’s no place for the new thing to go -the flip side is that if you want to attract something to you and you create the space for it, it will come. Once you get this and can let go of the “space takers” it is amazing how quickly you will attract all of the things you desire.

Do you:

Want a wonderful partner and great friends to share your life with? Then get rid of all of the relationships in your life that are dragging you down -consciously decide to eliminate negative, abusive or dependent people from your life.

Want more peace and serenity? Then eliminate stress, worry and doubt from your thoughts -replace them instead with good goals, plans of action and positive affirmation.

Want a wardrobe full of clothes you feel fabulous in? Then clean out and organize your closet - either donate the clothes that you don’t like or don’t fit or get them altered.

Want more free time? Then learn to say no to activities you don’t really enjoy or aren’t consistent with your primary goals. Get rid of the tolerances that suck up your time -make sure things are put away when you are done with them so you don’t waste time looking for them the next time you need them. Keep things properly maintained -it takes more time to repair than to maintain. Take the time to organize your schedule ahead of time.

Want more energy? Then get rid of the activities, people or events that drain your energy -you know what and who they are… it’s OK to stick up for yourself, the people who are really important to you will appreciate you for it.

Want more money? Then organize your finances -get Quicken and get on a budget. Know your financial situation. Cut unnecessary expenses from your budget. Buy only what you need. Donate to a charity. Get rid of high interest credit cards.

These are just a few ideas to help you understand the concept and I do understand that a lot of this is easier written than done. Start with the little tolerances, the ones that are easiest to eliminate. Get a coach or a friend to support you and hold you accountable. This is so worth it! I have learned in my own life that when I clear out and organize my thoughts, my living environment, my relationships and life AND have a list of good goals and intentions, the space that is left behind is filled with good things and life is joyful.

To get you started on having more of what you do want -download the PDF below and pick one thing to eliminate today! Addition by Subtraction -the new math!

200 Tolerations

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This topic has come up quite a bit in coaching sessions lately -and oddly enough, on several radio talk shows I listen to regularly. The question is: Are you happy? I mean, are you really happy? And, what does it take to be happy?

Here’s my happiness theory -and it’s really quite simple. You are happy when your life is aligned with your values. The problem is that most people have no idea what their values are and have never taken the time to find out. If they do know, they are so busy in the career they landed in or in the personal life that is controlling them, that they don’t have the time or ability to get into alignment.

Here are some easy steps to get you on your way:

1. Figure out what your values are: Try the Values Game (I have a link to it on the left side of this page) another way is to make a list of 3 people you really admire and write down the reasons you admire them -chances are they are living consistent with your values. The important thing to remember about values is that they are YOUR values -not values that your parents tried to instill in you or that your spouse has -they are yours and they are perfectly fine for you. I believe the reason for a lot of unhappiness is that we sometimes live according to someone else’s values not our own. A great example is that of a young woman I once knew who married an older man with 3 kids and a strict religious lifestyle -overnight she became immersed in being a mother and going to church services and other religious functions -in just a few short years she was suffering from major depression because she was living a life that was so far out of alignment with her true values which were career, independence and freedom of spiritual expression. Sometimes figuring out what your values really are takes some serious soul searching and the commitment to authenticity, but it is so worth it -the rewards are huge!

2. Life Assessment: Once you figure out what your values are -take a look at all of the areas of your life. Does your career reflect your values? Are your relationships consistent with your values? Is your environment a reflection of your values? Are your hobbies and leisure time activities consistent with your values. Often when I am coaching someone who says they are just not happy but they can’t figure out why, and we do this assessment, it doesn’t surprise me to find that there is not one area of life that is a reflection of the client’s true values. The key to change of any kind is to take an honest assessment of the situation -bring it out under the harsh light of day -it can be difficult to do, but it is the first step -and with many people, harsh assessment alone is the catalyst for unbelievable change.

3. One Step at a Time: Now that you know your values and have assessed where your life is out of alignment, just start making small changes to get into alignment. It might not be easy to change careers now, but you can start researching that career that would make you feel like you are making a difference, you can take a class in something that interests you, you can take up a new hobby, repair an old friendship, spend more time with your kids, de-clutter the house, paint a room your favorite uplifting color…. there are a number of “doable” things you can take on right now. Once you start adding these values driven things into your life, you will start to experience happiness and you will find all of your decisions start somehow bringing your life into alignment even more.

I said earlier in the post that these were easy steps -for some they are and for some they are not. If you are stuck, I highly recommend hiring a personal coach to help you through it. A coach will help you stay focused and will be a non-judgemental sounding board and above all will be on your side and want for you the same happiness you want for yourself.

I am pleased to say that I am happier now than I ever have been in my life and that is because I know my own values and I am making constant efforts to live consistent with those values, but it is an ongoing journey… and I look forward to it!

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It’s September 7th already??? I intended to post to this blog at least once per week… every time I thought about it, I had other things to do and put it off until later -here I am a month later and am just now doing it.

The good news is I’m doing it now and I didn’t wait too long -but it makes me think about some of the things in my life that I really wanted to do, but just kept putting off until one day it was too late and the desire just kind of melted away. Like finishing my son’s scrapbook -somewhere along the way it came off the list and I never think about it (until just now, I just added it back to the list) -he just started 8th grade and I have done up until 5th grade, so I’m still good! And I guess that is the good news -you can always put something you really wanted to do back on the list.

What is really frightening, though, is the thought that there are many people out there who just never get around to doing the things that make them really happy -the things they are passionate about. All because the little day to day things get in the way and they just never find the time. My suggestion to them is JUST DO IT! The little things will still be there and half of them aren’t important anyway (I’m listening to my own advice!). We know that when you set a goal and follow your dreams, the laws of the Universe kick in and good things happen.

And then there are those who just follow their passions regardless of the consequences and somehow it all works out. One of my customers has a passion for film making -he’s young and basically self taught -he’s gotten the funding to make a film from friends and family and he’s just gone out and done it. He just submitted a short version of his scary film to a film festival and is waiting for some good news. Who knows what will happen, if anyone will like it (I do!), if he will be a famous director/producer some day (I think he will!), something great will happen -and who cares anyway… he’s doing what he wants to do and he’s doing it now. He’ll never wake up one day and say “I wish I had given it a try” -I hope I never do, either…

www.nystrangler.com

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